The storm before the calmMarch 8, 2011 at 3:46 pm | Posted in Uncategorized | 1 Comment
You know those moms you see at the mall or in a restaurant, their kid is kicking and wailing on the floor, and they just have this look on their face…that look of defeat? I always pitied those moms. And I hate to say I judged them, too. Not so much in a can’t-you-control-your-child kind of way, but more in a why-are-you-even-taking-them-out-here kind of why.
But now…oh now. I am that mom.
Every morning we get up, eat breakfast, watch cartoons, take a shower, get dressed. Sprinkled throughout with screaming fits, time outs, and much shouting. By 10 AM I’m ready for something else. A trip to the store. A play date. Anything but sitting at home entertaining this increasingly temperamental child. And while I know there’s a good chance of public humiliation, I’m confident I’ll get 30 minutes of peace in the car, or an hour’s peace on the train. And with any luck when we arrive back home he’ll be ready for a nap.
There was this blissful moment not long ago when I was reflecting on how happy I was, how great it was that I got the opportunity to stay at home with my child AND do some graphic design in the downtime. I was even thinking let’s add another child to this equation. Why not!?
But now…oh now. I am exhausted.
There is one silver lining to this abysmal chaos I find myself in. A year ago my sister, whose daughter is a year older than Liam, couldn’t fathom having a second child. I figured it was because Evie was such a handful, but I’m realizing that even the easiest of infants can turn into a nightmare at two. And Liam was only really medium-easy. But this year something changed for her. Evie changed. And now she’s having her second baby in June.
So maybe, just maybe, things will change for us, too. Losing my freelance work will certainly help some. And already I’m finding I can bargain for good behavior with stickers and treats. Sometimes. I’m hoping by this summer my little monster will be my little buddy again.